Certain Movies & Things

“Dare Me”: And They All Come Tumbling Down

These girls do not stop. Fast and furious and without sound, they routinely plunge headfirst into the concrete below, unaware of the injuries they amount. USA Network’s Dare Me, based on the novel by Megan Abbott, has kept us reeling since Coach’s arrival, Beth’s first temper tantrum, and Addy’s annoying reluctance to choose a side. And now we’ve landed amid the squad’s triumph and full-fledged destruction.

WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS FROM EPISODES 1 – 8.

What an awkward turn of events. Beth (played by Marlo Kelly) went from the friend we equated with poison ivy to the friend Addy (Herizen Guardiola) should have stuck with all along, and Coach (Willa Fitzgerald) has proven to be so not worth the effort. Coach, who’s forgotten that she’s the adult and these girls are the children, thought she had Beth figured out from the get-go and enjoyed knocking her off her pedestal. And sure, we enjoyed watching, but now we’re tired. Coach took Addy under her very non-nurturing, hawk-like wing and created a monster, and now it’s up to Beth to wrangle that monster back in and whip her straight. Because Beth, it turns out, is Addy’s glimmer of hope after all, and maybe Addy will stop pretending Coach cares about anyone other than herself and appreciate that Beth is, surprisingly but also not so surprisingly, the loyal one.

(Loyal to a fault and much too forgiving, if you ask me.)

Just two episodes ago, Addy made a bold move when she told Beth that nothing is ever enough for her. (And at regionals! When they were about to take the stage, at that!)

What?

Yes, that selfish, selfish Beth. Nothing is ever enough for her. Yet she never asks for anything. Remind me how that works? (Luckily, and with no thanks to Addy, Beth didn’t falter. They’re going to state.)

Still, it’s easy to understand why Addy would mistake Beth’s dependence on her as asking for too much. Beth acts strong, but it’s obvious that she isn’t. She didn’t fare well after being sexually assaulted (we think?) by Kurtz (Chris Zylka), one of the Marine recruiters that the girls like to party with because it makes them feel unteenagerish, but she put on the bravest face that she could while breaking down into the lost, frightened girl she hides behind her ruthless façade.

Marlo Kelly and Herizen Guardiola in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

So Addy has exceptional timing, said no one ever. Everybody else in Beth’s life has let her down, consistently and without remorse, and Addy concludes that this is the essential moment to join in and trade up? Beth is used to it from the others, but losing Addy during the aftermath of whatever happened with Kurtz was a punch in the gut. If nothing is ever enough for Beth, maybe it’s because Addy is constantly trying to replace her. Maybe what’s enough for Beth is the assurance that Addy will finally treat her as enough. Who is it that’s never satisfied again?

Take a look in the mirror, Addy.

Would Addy have been gallivanting off with Coach if Coach had nothing to give? But what is Coach giving anyway? She takes – that’s for sure – but there’s not a lot of giving going on. A bunch of empty promises isn’t a fair exchange for everything she demands from Addy. If Addy insists on continually looking for the next big thing, she’d best learn that Coach ain’t it.

Hey Addy, watch my kid for me while I cheat on my husband (Rob Heaps), would ya?

Hey Addy, only come around when it’s convenient for me; otherwise, I don’t know you. K?

Hey Addy, come watch me clean up a crime scene because… because?

To be fair, we’re guilty of hasty judgments too. Remember? Well-meaning Coach, here to create a winning team in a fair and competitive way while Beth the villainous schemer was sabotaging the squad from behind closed doors. Yeah, so…(oops!), Coach went in a different direction. It’s a harsh truth, but we get it now. She may have shown up to do what Bert Cassidy (Paul Fitzgerald) hired her to do, but the job got hectic when her feud with Beth tangled with her dirty secrets. Then her solution was to buy Addy’s obedience and strain her relationship with Beth.

Willa Fitzgerald and Herizen Guardiola in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

But wailing on Coach isn’t to say Beth is perfect – or that we were wrong about her. After all, we’ve seen Beth taunt her little sister, bully the other girls, play mind games with Addy, and fly off the handle in unsettling ways. But none of this is news to Addy, so why didn’t she wave goodbye to Beth a long time ago? Coach offers Addy the world, so it’s time for Addy to judge Beth harshly and make her feel the twist of the knife?

Not cool, Addy. You accepted what Beth was. Now own it.

But the ninth episode has brought us full circle. Beth is back in battle mode, and this time we love it. Unfortunately, it’s Sergeant Will’s (Zach Roerig) demise that gave Beth the ammo she needs. Coach is walking a tightrope to keep the police from discovering her affair with Will, and Beth is going to eat that up. But if it hadn’t been Will’s tragic “suicide” that snapped Beth out of her haze, it would have been something else. Was she really going to lie down and surrender? Unlikely. And this time she has the upper hand and knows it. She’s played this game enough to know when her opponent is on edge and it’s the ideal moment to strike. And Coach doesn’t handle that strike with the same collected cool that she did the first time Beth tested her. Then again, Beth didn’t just test her this time; she outright knocked Coach out of the ballpark. It. was. glorious. Of all the teasing moments of grandstanding we’ve seen since the series started, this subsequential blow was a long time coming. And if we know anything, Beth is not finished.

With one episode left and Beth’s curiosity about what really happened to Will all settled in and comfortable, it’s going to be one beautiful mess. And while we probably won’t get all the conclusions we want (here’s to hoping for a second season!), someone puh-lease make Addy choose already.

Team Beth here. Unlike that other one, she’s a likable kinda evil and she didn’t introduce Addy to a dead body.

Watch full episodes at USA Network.
https://www.usanetwork.com/dare-me

Random Book Review: “The Sleepwalker” by Chris Bohjalian

You wish that you could remember their faces when you’re awake. But they dissolve. They become indistinguishable, the faces on the deck of a great ship as it pushes away from the port. You are aware mostly of their arms waving.

Lianna is home from college for the weekend when her mother sleepwalks away during the dead of night and doesn’t return, leaving the young woman to blame herself for not having predicted the likelihood of it all, and to assess how undone her 12-year-old sister, Paige, is becoming behind the courageous mask she wears. When the police conduct a thorough search of the surrounding land that unearths nothing more than a torn piece of cloth that matches Annalee Ahlberg’s nightgown, and canvassing the bottom of the river near the Ahlberg’s home determines no further trace, Lianna’s confidence that the detectives will solve her mother’s disappearance falls apart.

If you haven’t read a good mystery in a while – or even if you have – Chris Bohjalian’s The Sleepwalker is a flabbergasting brain-twister that will leave you scouring through Goodreads for another one like it, scanning reviews for key words and phrases such as “shocking” and “guessing till the end”. Bohjalian has you lurking in every corner trying to piece the clues together except the one where they actually fit.

As the aftermath of Annalee’s Ahlberg’s disappearance winds down to a guessing game that no one in the family’s small Vermont town can make sense of, time filters out the possibility that she is still out there, sleepwalking her way home. Lianna puts college on hold so she can help her father and take care of her kid sister. Warren Ahlberg, who was out of town on business when his wife wandered off in her sleep, is initially the chief suspect – as husbands usually are. Suspicions against him aren’t high for long since he has a solid alibi and no motive beyond the speculations of small-town gossip, although Lianna worries about her father’s omission from scrutiny as she dives into her own investigation of her mother’s personal life, which harbors unsettling secrets and raises hard questions that Lianna can’t shut out.

Upon discoveries of her parent’s marriage – which was more complex than she realized – that beg for explanation and understanding, Lianna begins interrogating her mother’s friends and seeking morsels from those with a propensity for gossip. There’s also the curious link between her mother and Gavin Rikert, the handsome young detective who’s investigating the case and taking an overt interest in Lianna. He’s straightforward with Lianna about his friendship with her mother, but after rifling through her mother’s emails, Lianna is bothered by her mother’s deliberate secrecy. Why had she never mentioned him?

Despite reservations, Lianna is inexplicably drawn to Gavin and can’t resist his romantic gestures, even as she wonders if his friendship with her mother was really just that. He seems sincere, but Lianna can’t shake the feeling that he’s concealing a trunk-load of secrets – specifically from her.

As Lianna gets closer to the truth, her fears become walking nightmares. We’re rapidly turning the pages, collecting hints that may or may not factor into Annalee Ahlberg’s disappearance. But the most obvious ones fly right over our heads. The Sleepwalker blindsides and then rattles to the core as Chris Bohjalian masters a jaw-dropping conclusion that will leave you sitting in bewildered silence long after you’ve read the final page.

Purchase through Barnes & Noble here: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/reviews/the-sleepwalker-chris-bohjalian/1123775087?ean=9780804170994

On Hulu: “The Romantics”

A bride, a groom, and a maid of honor that dated the groom for four years. What could go wrong? Well, not as much as one might think, but still enough to ruin everyone’s day, and Hulu’s got it. The Romantics stars Anna Paquin as Lila, the polished bride who’s either vindictive or oblivious or vindictively pretending to be oblivious, Josh Duhamel as Tom, the restless groom who behaves more like a groom who’s about to take flight than a groom who thought this through at all, and Katie Holmes as Laura, the understandably afflicted maid of honor who would rather be doing anything else on the planet than playing happy helper to her sadistic best friend, who’s in for the world’s most awkward toast considering her peculiar maid-of-honor choice.

Based on the novel by Galt Niederhoffer, who also wrote and directed the screen adaptation that debuted at The Sundance Film Festival in 2010, The Romantics opens with Laura trying to make herself look somewhat enthused while she miserably makes her way to Lila’s family’s beach house, where the rehearsal dinner and wedding are set to take place. After watching her attempt to cheer herself up by singing along with the radio and then beating up the steering wheel instead, we get that she desperately wants this weekend to be over with. And after watching Lila watch Tom wander off by himself to kick rocks by the sea while her mother (Candice Bergin) unsuccessfully tries to tell her that this behavior isn’t normal for a groom, we get that Lila and Tom want this weekend to be over with too. But for different reasons. Lila wants to be rest assured that the wedding took place, and Tom wants his temptation to leave Lila all alone at the altar like a fool to quit plaguing him. (Because surely he’ll feel joyful and relieved once he just marries the girl already, right?)

Candice Bergin, Anna Paquin, and Josh Duhamel in *The Romantics* (2010)

It’s not long before the pieces of Laura, Lila, and Tom’s sordid past begin to surface, and considering each of their roles in this bizarre wedding, we eagerly anticipate the rest of the story’s unraveling. Pile on the diverse wedding party that’s more interested in the hows and whys of the wedding than they are the wedding itself, and we’ve got one interesting weekend ahead. Trip (played by Malin Ackerman), Jake (Adam Brody), Pete (Jeremy Strong), and Weesie (Rebecca Lawrence Levy) have been friends with Lila, Tom, and Laura since they all met ten years prior, during freshman year of college – also when Tom and Laura began dating. Lila and Laura, known as La-La to their friends, were roommates and best friends throughout college and remain best friends all these years later. (If they say so.)

Trip, who makes her importance known from the get-go, is the first to broach the subject of the Tom and La-La saga. Why Tom pursued Lila is a mystery that’s perturbed her over the years, but most especially since their engagement. She gives us the breakdown of the whens and hows while confiding in Jake, who argues that she’s being melodramatic but seems more annoyed about having to carry this burden now too. As far as Jake is concerned, it’s not a problem until he’s forced to see it, and thanks to Trip, now he sees it. But what Trip doesn’t tell us, and what puzzles her most, is why Tom asked out Lila during what Trip rehashes as suspicious timing. She has her theories, though, and she’s not careful in making them apparent. Unlike the others, Trip doesn’t passively wonder. She’s vocal, eager, and surprisingly aware. She notices and questions everything while the others pretend it’s peachy-keen and not weird at all.

Katie Holmes, Rebecca Lawrence Levy, Malin Ackerman, Anna Paquin, Josh Duhamel, Jeremy Strong, and Adam Brody in *The Romantics* (2010)

The fun begins when Lila bolts out of the rehearsal dinner after the first of many humiliating moments that she should have foreseen but… didn’t? She heads to her room for the rest of the night so as not to risk seeing Tom after the clock strikes 12. (She’s superstitious.) Meanwhile, the others head to the beach for drunken skinny-dipping and whatever other mischief ensues. It’s a reunion, after all, and mischief does ensue. While Lila is locked away in a bedroom on the second floor, voicing her own doubts about Tom to her little sister, Minnow (Dianna Agron), Tom is pulling a disappearing act and the rest of the group is embarking on their own dicey adventures in the name of “finding Tom.”

They decide to journey off in pairs, leaving Laura the oddball out because Trip and Pete are married, and Jake and Weesie are engaged. This puts Laura with Lila’s creepy brother, Chip (Elijah Wood), who’s not only been leering at her since the walk-through rehearsal but also nearly stole her world’s most awkward toast award during dinner. The group makes a half-assed attempt to save Laura from Chip, but the couples stupidly swap partners while barely looking Laura’s way. So this pointless switch-around still leaves Laura to fend off Chip.

But it’s not all bad if you’re us (or Chip), not Laura & Friends.

Chip gets pretty real after the other four race off to cheat on each other and run around naked. “It’s ironic, isn’t it?” he asks Laura. “Asking you, of all people, to convince the groom to show up for this wedding?” Maybe Chip isn’t as big a chump as we thought. He raises one of the best points so far and, sure, he was referring to how Laura’s friends sent her off to help find Tom and drag his ass back to his bride-to-be, but he unintentionally raises the question of whether Lila (however subconsciously) asked Laura to be her maid of honor to ensure Tom would show up – to his wedding. If Lila isn’t as clueless as anyone in her position would have to be, she knows Tom has always loved Laura, and that as odd as it really really is, he’s not going to miss this opportunity to see her again. (This opportunity, just to reiterate, being his wedding – to Lila, not Laura.)

Or maybe Lila just wants the satisfaction of forcing Laura to stand three feet away while she’s the one to marry Tom.

Either way, nicely played, Lila. But it’s still going to be a disaster. Other lives are at stake, and they all love La-La and Tom.

And each other.

If you discount the debauchery and daring stunts that border on adultery, you have a group of friends so enviable that there’s a reason they hardly exist beyond fiction. The seven companions balance each other out with their strengths and weaknesses, complement each other at their best and worst, and have a clear understanding of how to guide each other through every bump and hitch in the road.

Laura is the headstrong giver who bottles up her feelings until she can’t, Lila is the picture-perfect allurer who knows how to make her friends feel loved and encouraged when she doesn’t feel so loved and encouraged herself, Tom is the stable sympathizer who wants so badly to stop planning his life based on what’s expected of him, Trip is the uninhibited wild card who means well even when doesn’t behave well, Jake is the self-righteous loyalist who wants to see the best in everyone but often fails, Pete is the jokester who’s always reaching for the spotlight but seems okay when he doesn’t quite get it, and Weesie is the prudent wallflower who just wants to be a good friend and see everyone else do the same.

It’s a wonderland until love gets in the way and competitive edges go too far.

Rebecca Lawrence Levy, Jeremy Strong, Malin Ackerman, and Katie Holmes in The Romantics (2010)

The heated confrontation between Laura and Tom is well on its way, coming with it the predictable encounter that will make or break Tom’s looming grievances. And La-La’s face-off, better described as a meteoric explosion, exceeds our expectations in every way possible. But unfortunately for everyone involved, too many pent-up frustrations emerge, irreversible decisions will be made, and the consequence is an inevitable collapse from which the group might be too vulnerable to survive.

The Romantics shines a light on the complex nature of human beings and relationships, where love and hate can co-exist in one short breath. Bonds are strong but wide eyes are weak, and no matter how tightly knit, few connections are safe from the toll that deceit disguised as aloofness can take. This isn’t a story about Tom and La-La. This is a story about seven friends tested by a love triangle that disobeys boundaries and demands recognition. After six years of underestimating its power, accountability and self-discovery will force the friends to confront whether or not their attachments have withstood the test of time.

Watch on Hulu!

https://www.hulu.com/movie/the-romantics-47fce37f-94cc-4366-aab5-a985e3663fa5

The Good Girls Are Still Killin’ It! Kinda.

They’re back! And even though they’re plunging deeper into financial ruin and edging closer to the repercussions of financial ruin that drove them to armed robbery and the transportation of counterfeit money across the U.S. border to begin with, they haven’t learned that their stab at building a criminal enterprise isn’t alleviating their fiscal woes. At all. So not only are they back; they’re back at it. And it’s destined to be a lot of the same mishaps and defeated sighs that have plagued them since day one.

But you’ve gotta admit they have drive.

Let’s not forget that watching the FBI raid her husband’s (played by Matthew Lillard) car dealership while she rushed to destroy evidence in the women’s restroom wasn’t enough to convince Beth (Christina Hendricks) to find a new (honest) venture. And watching police escort her husband, Stan (Reno Wilson), out of their home in handcuffs as their children looked on wasn’t enough to scare the godforsaken daylights out of Ruby (Retta), who’s the most jittery of them all. And learning that her boyfriend (Sam Huntington) was an undercover FBI agent collecting evidence of her criminal activity was depressing for Annie (Mae Whitman) in every way except the one that should have affected her willingness to conduct unauthorized business as usual.

Clearly, the good girls are desperate. And addicted. And maybe a little bit too sure of themselves by now. But we’re still rooting for them, aren’t we?

Well…yes.

The third season of Good Girls has Beth busying herself with attempts to clear her conscience after fatally (or so she thinks) shooting Rio (Manny Montana) in last season’s finale, Ruby suffering the degradation of watching Stan work security at a gentlemen’s club so they can afford their sick daughter’s (Lidya Jewett) medical care, and Annie going through the motions after realizing her life is a series of crashes that never repair and burns that never heal.

Hearts may ache for Annie the most. She’s never found solid ground, and the odds of doing so anytime soon aren’t in her favor. It also doesn’t help that Beth and Ruby remind Annie of her failures every chance they get. Either Beth has forgotten that her perfect life is incredibly imperfect these days, or pointing out her little sister’s flaws helps her forget where she herself went wrong. After all, it wasn’t that long ago that Beth went from superhousewifemom to superwhateverthehellthisis in one fell swoop, so surely any distraction helps. And Ruby has always followed Beth’s lead. That’s why she’s in this cataclysmal mess in the first place, so why not play along and belittle Annie, too?

Retta, Mae Whitman, and Christina Hendricks in Good Girls. Universal Television.

No longer under Rio’s thumb, which also means they’re on their own and without his expertise, it’s a rocky start for the trio as they spend weeks trying to assemble the perfect bill. Mastering Alexander Hamilton’s bouffant and the shadow behind his cravat is a lot harder than Annie anticipated. She’s certain that these are just “microscopic inconsistencies,” but JT (Julian Gant), the quick cash employee who isn’t holding a grudge after being kidnapped, tied up, and blindfolded by the good girls in season 2 (maybe hand-feeding him a burrito helped curtail negative feelings?), assures her that these microscopic inconsistencies “will get you ten to twenty in the state pen.” He then proves his point by running the bill through the cash machine and claiming “Denied!” as it lights up red and beeps out the error signal.

“Rome wasn’t built in a day.” Annie, scurrying for optimism in this moment of defeat.

“It burnt down in a night.” Thanks, JT. Very helpful. (Can we keep him this time, though?)

But the chips slowly fall in their favor. The good girls finally perfect Alexander Hamilton’s hair and accessories after eliciting help from an eccentric new character (Charlyne Yi) we’ll hopefully see much much more of, and the only hurdle now blocking their way, that pesky FBI agent (James Lesure) who just won’t get off your back no matter how many times you save his life, coincidentally becomes a lesser hurdle. But haven’t the good girls learned there are no coincidences?

It appears Beth is in for one heck of a surprise. So much for clearing her conscience.

It’s clear, Beth. It’s quite clear.

We have 15 more episodes to gobble up what just might be the most seductive season of Good Girls yet. If we’re lucky. But I’m not betting on their luck.

So now that the good girls are back in business and the new season is in motion, the big question is this: Are Beth and Rio going to have proper hate-sex before they try to kill each other? Please please please let us have this. I mean, it’s not like we’re asking for some clichéd nonsense of a “Beth loves Rio” fairytale ending, are we? No, not… yet.

Christina Hendricks, Manny Montana, Reno Wilson, Retta, Sam Huntington, and Mae Whitman in Good Girls. Universal Television.

Watch at https://www.nbc.com/good-girls

Infinite Mess: “The Good Place” & Its Almost Tragic Finale

OF COURSE I watched The Good Place when it first aired in 2016. There was no way I couldn’t. With Kristen Bell and Ted Danson as central characters, how could it go wrong? Kristen Bell charmed me as the sassy and fearless girl detective on Veronica Mars in 2004 and continued to impress when she made a turn toward comedy, starring alongside Jamie Lee Curtis and Sigourney Weaver in the underrated rom-com, You Again, making guest appearances as Leslie Pope’s recurring foe on Parks & Recreation, and scoring leading roles in hits like Bad Moms and A Bad Mom’s Christmas. And who could forget Ted Danson as Sam Malone, the cocky ladies man who bartended for one of wackiest packs ever to grace television in the acclaimed ‘80s sit-com Cheers? He made a few notable appearances on the big screen and then took an interesting turn in the late ‘90s when he emerged as the title character in Becker, an absurdly entertaining comedy about a grouchy, disagreeable doctor who ran a clinic in New York City and tried like hell to hide his benevolent side.

So The Good Place was sure to be a hit. And it was. Its quirkiness, originality, and hilarity took modern television to new heights. Even as each season came to a catastrophic close for the good guys and I felt lukewarm about where the story was going, my excitement spiked up again with each new season’s opening as the show’s commitment to surprises and non-stop laughter continued. And The Good Place increasingly became so exceptional that I was so. not. happy. when the fourth season was announced as its last.

But the final episodes were more meaningful and inspiring than those of any television comedy I’ve seen. The Good Place’s departure wasn’t just poignant; it was teachable.

Kristen Bell and William Jackson Harper in *The Good Place*. Fremulon Productios.

We learn lessons from various movies and shows that we watch, but we don’t often learn what feels like the lesson – or, at the very least, an eye-opening perspective on the meaning of life – and living. When Eleanor (Bell), Michael (Danson), and their friends arrive, alas, at The Good Place (the real Good Place), they find that the never-ending pleasures of the afterlife are far less gratifying than they were in mortal life. This disappointing revelation spawns yet another disappointing revelation. Infinity, they discover, diminishes everything.

“When perfection goes on forever, you become this glassy-eyed mush person,” one Good Place resident, a legendary philosopher (played by Lisa Kudrow) who can no longer remember basic mathematics, tells Eleanor and Chidi (William Jackson Harper) during an outburst of frustration, insisting she used to be cool and study “so much…things.”

“Everyone here is a happiness zombie, and no one is doing anything about it, because by the time they realize it’s happening, everyone is too far gone to care,” Eleanor tells the rest of the gang, who sigh in exasperation. The four humans in the group reached their final destination after thousands of lifetimes of ridding themselves of the qualities that had initially put them in The Bad Place, and it’s but a half hour before they stumble upon another obstacle.

But all things considered, it’s a “how did we not see this coming?” moment. Every time they were sure they were no longer selfish, narcissistic heathens, a test would prove otherwise. Every time they thought they had a challenge in the bag, they were outwitted by demons. And every time they actually won, surprise!, the reward ranged from not-so-rewardish to apocalyptic.

Lisa Kudrow, D’Arcy Carden, Manny Jacinto, and Jameela Jamil in *The Good Place*. Fremulon Productions.

So now, they face a harsh truth. While infinite bliss appears to be the utmost paradise, the chief of all rewards that brings comfort to dying, it’s actually a sort of resting home for those with nothing left to do because doing everything got boring. Even Jason (Manny Jacinto) can only spend so much time Go-Karting with monkeys. Nobody saw that one coming, even after witnessing one of the world’s most renowned philosophers struggling to formulate a sentence.

Suddenly there’s an alternate view on living. What we too often see as a rat race of constant battles to reach endpoints and then revel in the prizes and achievements for as long as we can until it’s time to fight the next battle and then repeat repeat repeat, we forget that, without limited choices, without limited goals, and without the reminder of the limited time we took to focus on those limited choices and goals, the payoff really isn’t so great.

We see that with Tahani (Jameela Jamil) and her to-do list, where she masters every skill that there is from becoming a master woodworker to cooking something vegan that doesn’t taste vegan, not because she has a passion or even moderate interest for each skill, but because she knows time doesn’t matter where it doesn’t exist. Technically, for her, there’s no time wasted. Her bucket list isn’t narrowed down to things she wants to accomplish or experience in a mindful way that brings meaning to her as a person and therefore defines her, so the more she marks something off her list, the more dull it becomes. The exuberance of passing these barriers fades rather quickly, and soon enough, Tahani only sees emptiness ahead.

“Okay, that’s it, in a nutshell,” their new philosopher friend tells them before forgetting how to speak again. “‘Cause you get here, and you realize that anything’s possible, and you do everything, and then you’re done. But you still have infinity left. This place kills fun, and passion, and excitement, and love. Till all you have left are milkshakes.”

They conquer this dilemma, of course, and we find their solution satisfactory even if sometimes heartbreaking. These are characters we’ve grown to love, after all, and we’ve spent four seasons watching them grow to love each other and come to want to be good people, and not so they could get into The Good Place (which is what initially drove them to better themselves), but because they felt themselves changing into good people, and they liked it. They liked being good.

Even Michael, a demon who spent over a thousand years torturing people in The Bad Place and loving it, was awakened by the powerful bond of friendship after spending too much time with the humans and was spellbound by how good it felt to care about others and have others care about him too. And Janet (D’Arcy Carden), Michael’s not-at-all-human sidekick through both the bad and the good of him, had the same epiphany when she fell in love with one of the humans. She had no idea she was even capable of feeling feelings, good or bad, so this revelation brought on a bliss that she was going to fight for, every step of the way.

And she did fight. They all did. And like Eleanor says when she finally feels at peace, “You know, Michael, at the end of the day, you were right. Everything is fine.”

William Jackson Harper and Kristen Bell in *The Good Place*. Fremulon Productions.

The lesson? Living our lives is The Good Place. We can worry about the rest later.

Watch the last five episodes at https://www.hulu.com/series/the-good-place-f11df77f-115e-4eba-8efa-264f0ff322d0

or the first three seasons at https://www.netflix.com/search?q=the%20good%20place&jbv=80113701&jbp=0&jbr=0

and the fourth and final season at https://www.nbc.com/the-good-place

Fun Fact: Nice Girls Are Interesting Too. Enter Taylor Swift.

I had always liked Taylor Swift just fine. I didn’t own her albums or follow her on Twitter, I didn’t buy magazines because she was on the cover or pay attention to the latest Taylor gossip that whatever tabloid was fussing about. But I did stop scrolling through the radio when I heard the catchy tune of “You Belong With Me” or “Fearless,” and I probably sang along too.

And then “Mean” debuted in October of 2010. It was the first single on her newest album, Speak Now, which was set to release later that year. For me, it was the perfect song at the perfect time. Each word resonated so deeply that I felt grateful to Taylor for writing a song that made me smile triumphantly every time I played it, which was often and repeatedly. I listened to it over and over because it ignited a spark inside of me that I wanted to keep. A spark Taylor didn’t know she had given me.

It was that same October that I had escaped an abusive relationship that I should have walked away from the previous winter when he first exerted his alarmingly perilous side by forcing me to do something that I didn’t want to do, sending me into full-on meltdown mode while I struggled to be myself again. But since the effects of emotional abuse in a romantic relationship are on a whole other realm that I could speak out about until my voice goes dry, I’ll spare you the gritty details for now and go back to my initial point about how Taylor laid out my feelings so well – almost too well. She didn’t know my tormentor, but she knew was familiar with his type.

And I can see you years from now in a bar
Talking over a football game
With that same big loud opinion
But nobody’s listening, washed up and ranting
About the same old bitter things
Drunk and grumbling on about how I can’t sing
But all you are is mean
All you are is mean and a liar and pathetic
And alone in life and mean, and mean, and mean, and mean

Well, I don’t know if he’s still cursing loudly in public with his same negative outbursts and bitter cynicism, I don’t know if he’s washed up and alone and drunk and lying, and I don’t care. I only know and care that “Mean” played to me then, and even though I’m long past the ordeal that Taylor was so complicit in helping me through, my fandom hasn’t waned. It’s only grown over the years, as has she.

But someday I’ll be living in a big old city
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean
Yeah someday I’ll be big enough
So you can’t hit me
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean

Ten years ago, Taylor was right. One day, she’d be too big to hit. And by now, she’s been there for a while. So mighty that she can’t fall.

So yes, I was excited to see Netflix’s new documentary about America’s beloved country queen turned pop star. Although, going in, I didn’t know what to expect. I knew it wouldn’t be a scandalous affair since Ms. Swift had a hand in the project and, even with her share of gossip-worthy incidents and occasions of overblown controversy that temporarily turned America against her, Ms. Swift is about as tame as they come. And knowing the unlikelihood that Taylor would invent hair-raising tales about herself, I was concerned that Miss Americana would be pretty uninteresting, even downright boring. So maybe the lesson here is that the nicest girl can in fact be the most interesting girl. Or damn near close.

Taylor Swift, as we all know, has reached unimaginable stardom. Active in the industry since she was 14 years old, and then a full-fledged celebrity by her late teens, it’s not uncommon to hear Ms. Swift’s name and conjure an image of the 19-year-old girl who accepted her first Grammy and captured our hearts in one fell swoop on a victorious September night. To look at her today is extraordinary. She has blossomed into a capable, intelligent woman right before our eyes, and has seemingly become the most powerful woman in the music industry without even trying.

But to say she wasn’t trying is ignorant. Miss Americana shows us that, while Taylor was born with an extraordinary talent that few can champion, her recognition is just. The artist’s work ethic is severely underestimated and her devotion to her fans is overlooked completely. While we were busy talking about her love life and who her friends were and dissecting everything she said (or didn’t say), the songstress was putting everything she had into producing music that we wanted to hear. From the beginning, it was always about us, and she used every ounce of energy she had to inspire and wow all who were watching. Fame wasn’t simply handed to her, but even if it had been, the magnitude to which she excelled wasn’t pure luck. When all is said and done, even the most skeptical viewers won’t be able to shake that.

Miss Americana takes us through Taylor’s most iconic moments, from the horrifying night that Kanye West made our jaws drop in utter shock when he bolted onto the stage and interrupted her acceptance speech for the “Best Female Video” award at the MTV Video Music Awards over a decade ago, to the media’s constant mocking speculation on whom she’s dating this week, to her confrontation in the courtroom with the man who sexually assaulted her, to her recognition of her eating disorder, all the way to her considerably decisive moment to voice her political views for the first time in 2018 (and what came after).

Fresh, touching, and a little bit heartbreaking for those who love Ms. Swift, Miss Americana gives the best insight you’ll get thus far as to who Taylor is and the trials she faced to become her. Discard everything you’ve heard or read about Taylor, as well as any assumptions you may have had that she was unmoved in the midst of every “mean girl” accusation that was thrown her way, every attack she received for not taking part in political endorsements, every celebrity feud that she was unwittingly dragged into, and all the other scornful campaigns that were launched against her. Because while Taylor came back from defeat with grace and dignity, her wealth, fame, and beauty never disqualified her from feeling the effects of the loathing and ridicule that she was too often ambushed with. Let’s face it: when there’s nothing to hate, we invent it. And that’s what we did to Ms. Swift. But now it’s time to listen to her side of the story. It’s time to see her in raw form – vulnerable, passionate, caring, human – and fall in love with her again. This time for good.

Watch Miss Americana at netflix.com

https://www.netflix.com/search?q=miss%20americana&jbv=81028336&jbp=0&jbr=0

On Hulu: “White Bird in a Blizzard”

Shailene Woodley in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Eva Green in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shiloh Fernandez and Shailene Woodley in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shailene Woodley and Christopher Meloni in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shailene Woodley in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Eva Green in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shiloh Fernandez and Eva Green in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shailene Woodley and Shiloh Fernandez in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shailene Woodley in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.
Shailene Woodley, Gabourey Sidibe, and Mark Indelicato in White Bird in a Blizzard. Why Not Productions.

The most underrated movie currently streaming on Hulu isn’t flooded with action-packed sequences and special effects, or the name recognition often needed to give us pause, or the promotion that draws viewers in numbers that better reflect a movie’s worth, but it has everything else. Based on the 1999 novel by Laura Kasischke, White Bird in a Blizzard has gone surprisingly unnoticed since its 2014 release. With performances that leave you wondering if the script was written exclusively for the actors that deliver them, a soundtrack that adds layer upon layer to the most significant moments at exactly the right time, writing so melodious that it sends shivers through your spine, and a story so frighteningly beautiful you could weep as if it’s your own, it’s a wonder that the remarkably produced film bypassed mainstream audiences.

Shailene Woodley portrays Katrina Connors, whose story is as moving as it is deep, although some might question how moved she really is, a result of how well Shailene tackles the character’s pompous apathy. Without question, the talented actor gives Gregg Araki’s screenplay justice, breathing out the foreboding narration in a melancholy hum that captures Katrina’s essence entirely.

Katrina is your typical teenage girl, rife with insecurities and judgments. She arrives home from school one day to find out that her mother (played by Eva Green) has vanished. She initially brushes it off as a fluke incident that will have her flighty mother walking through the door any second, with or without explanation. The impassive 17-year-old goes through a whirlwind of coming into her own as the realization that she’s never going to see her mother again finally sets in. More a coming-of-age tale than a suspenseful thriller, White Bird in a Blizzard largely focuses on Katrina’s attempt to navigate her way through her formative years while dealing with her mother’s disappearance.

If you want a mystery, you’re getting one, but not in the traditional form that most mysteries are packaged in. Rather than following the investigation and pointing fingers every which way, there are times when the unknown whereabouts of Katrina’s mother are put aside completely, and Katrina moves forward as a confused teenager whose biggest concerns are no different than the next girl who’s stuck in the purgatory of adolescence. Her boyfriend (Shiloh Fernandez) no longer desires her sexually, she doesn’t know how to connect with her mundane father (Christopher Meloni), her sessions with her therapist (Angela Bassett) feel more like a chore than a relief, and her only escape from the harsh realities of living is her time spent with her two best friends (Gabourney Sidibe and Mark Indelicato), who are as bored with their lives in their small, unchanging town as Katrina is with hers. The gloomy protagonist keeps herself sane by lusting after the detective on her mother’s case (Thomas Jane) and pretending everything is fine.

But Katrina can no longer ignore her need for closure when images of her mother that she initially thought meaningless continually haunt her while she sleeps. Pleading for help in the midst of a snowstorm and bringing forth the eerie essence the movie might otherwise lack, Katrina’s mother makes it more and more difficult for her to assume she doesn’t want to be found.

Gripping, titillating, and ultimately shocking, White Bird in a Blizzard is a work of intrigue and deliverance that will jolt you in ways you’ll never see coming.

Purchase Laura Kasischke’s novel through Barnes & Noble

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/white-bird-in-a-blizzard-laura-kasischke/1102784642?ean=9780544465053

Check out the film’s original score

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/white-bird-in-a-blizzard-harold-budd/28229117?ean=0780163443424

“Dare Me”: Glitter, Pop, Cheer!

“There’s something dangerous about the boredom of teenage girls.”

And so opens USA Network’s enticing new dramatic thriller, Dare Me, based on the novel by Megan Abbott, who also co-produces the series, bringing with it the same dark and poetic tone that she effortlessly captured in its literary counterpart. We are five episodes in, and if you’re not watching, you should be. If you are watching, you agree.

Only Abbott can create a story about the struggle for power within a squad of high school cheerleaders and wrap it into something downright horrifyingly unpredictably good.

We first meet Addy and Beth (played by Herizen Guardiola and Marlo Kelly) in back-to-back scenes that hint at a downward spiral between the two protagonists throughout the series, spiking our interest as we wonder what kind of havoc we’re going to witness, and when. The prophetic opening shows Addy navigating her car at a creeping pace through the suburbs in the dead of night, the suspense set up perfectly by the daunted look on her face as she waits in careening anticipation for whatever is approaching in the blurry backdrop that we can’t quite see. We briefly alternate to muted girls dancing in their towels in a locker room and doing handsprings in perfect unison in the gymnasium, and then back to Addy, who is nervously checking her surroundings while fielding incoming texts from an unrelenting Beth.

The texts suggest conflict, with Beth pleading for attention in her very own Beth kind of way and Addy dismissing her. Cut to two months prior, where Addy and Beth steal beer from a gas station and then bolt to Beth’s bright blue Jeep, from which they tilt their faces toward the sky, enjoying a rush of adrenaline as they speed off and guffaw freely and authentically, driving past a dry cleaner no bigger than a two-car garage and boys entertaining themselves by taking a baseball bat to a box full of junk. Addy and Beth solidify, for us, their relationship as best friends who rule the world.

Herizen Guardiola and Marlo Kelly in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

The mood switches from dreamlike to actualization as we’re abruptly thrown into real-time. Beth is taking her role as captain of the cheerleading squad and cutting the girls down to size as she barely looks up from her phone. She’s a boss for sure, and if we’re to learn anything, it’s that she’ll settle for no less. She scolds the girls for not moving fast enough and quips that Addy will never keep her thigh gap “like that.”

Then pulls in Collette French (Willa Fitzgerald), who’s there to take over the position that Beth has happily filled and gotten used to. Addy marvels from the top of the bleachers as the alchemistic new coach walks fiercely yet unexcitedly through the parking lot below. To look at her, it’s just another day, not the day she enters unfamiliar territory and takes command of an unpredictable group of teenage girls. She knows she’s got this, and Addy can see it.

Willa Fitzgerald, Marlo Kelly, and Herizen Guardiola in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

Still, we see more than Addy is able. Coach’s luminous sunglasses don’t hide the perpetual sadness underneath. Her eyes long for something. Her eyes show an emptiness that her words never will.

And the story begins.

Herizen Guadiola and Marlo Kelly in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

We barely blink before Coach is whipping the girls into shape, working them hard, pushing them to their limits, too easily impressing them with her cutthroat authority. Well, impressing all except Beth, who’s been calling the shots and wants it to stay that way. She wastes no time making that clear when she challenges Coach. But Coach is equally challenging. She doesn’t like entitlement, and she’s not going to put up with a show.

Right there, the conflict is set.

But here we have two very different types of leaders. While Coach and Beth share the ability to command harshly and relentlessly, Coach does it in earnest. She knows that succumbing to mercy doesn’t create winners, and Coach wants her girls to be winners. Beth, on the other hand, enjoys the brutality of the charge, and that’s where her pull for dominance ends.

Marlo Kelly, Alison Thornton, and Willa Fitzgerald in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

Addy now finds herself caught between her best friend and the mentor she’s been unknowingly expecting. What’s refreshing about Addy is her passion for cheer. She isn’t soaking up her glory days and expecting to be handed more glory once she cashes those days in. Addy wants more, and not more than cheer, but more from cheer. Addy revels in what cheer can bring, and she’s willing to work for it rather than demand it. She just needs the abrasiveness to show what she’s got instead of lingering on the sidelines when thrown there by her more aggressive friend. And here’s Coach, who doesn’t see Addy as second to Beth. Finally, someone goes against the fray, giving the other girls a chance to earn recognition instead of allowing Beth to own the spotlight just because she always has.

But even with Coach offering some glimmer to Addy’s ambition, which had thus far been collecting dust on the shelf despite Addy’s not-so-confident insistence that she could make it happen, there remains the obstacle of her loyalty towards Beth. Coach seems like the obvious choice; however, we wonder, at times, if Beth’s cruelty really runs as deeply as we’re seeing.

The question surfaces every time we see Beth’s seemingly laughable father (Paul Fitzgerald) and self-involved mother (Tammy Blanchard) affect her in ways that she masks with apathy or scorn, or when we see the hurt that replaces Beth’s usual smug expression the first time Addy abandons her, leaving her to her own devices and giving us insight into her lonely world. With a mother who can’t be bothered and a father who instead dotes over the half-sister (Alison Thornton) that resulted in an extramarital affair, why wouldn’t we wonder if Beth is broken more than she is wicked?

But Coach has her own demons, which are sure to tumble Addy and Beth’s way, setting off a chain reaction they never see coming. If Dare Me isn’t good enough already, it certainly will be. The collision course that’s foreshadowed consistently throughout the first episode takes an explosive leap before the credits roll, and in the episodes to come, events spin so out of control that we gasp to catch our breath. And yet we still can’t look away.

Herizen Guardiola, Willa Fitzgerald, and Marlo Kelly in *Dare Me*. USA Network.

Catch up at usanetwork.com

https://www.usanetwork.com/dare-me

Purchase Megan Abbott’s book through Barnes & Noble

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/dare-me-megan-abbott/1106244238?ean=9780316430173#/

I’ll Tell You Those Reasons.

“Find what you love and let it kill you.”
Charles Bukowski

When the movie was over, I asked M if she thought Emma ever did love Joe. Because Emma never said yes or no when Joe asked her.

“We had a laugh, Joe.”

That’s not really an answer. Not a sufficient one, anyway.

“Don’t know,” M told me and got up to get more pizza.

“What do you think she meant when she said she didn’t owe him?” I pressed.

“Who knows?” M replied, checking her phone for messages.

“I wonder if she felt bad when Joe told her he’d mourned her, or if she was too empty to feel anything at all in the end.”

“Probably didn’t care,” M said, her mouth full.

“There was mad chemistry between Joe and Loretta, huh?”

M was no longer paying attention. She started talking about something she saw on Instagram, so whatever.

The next day, I asked my friend K about a film club she used to be in, where she and a group of fellow movie lovers would watch a movie and then analyze it to death. Because maybe I would start my own. (K’s film club was in another city.)

“I haven’t been in a while,” she said. “It was okay, but you’re going to get those ‘I’m a film student so my opinion is better than yours’ types. There’s always at least one, and they ruin it for everybody else.”

Ew, I thought. I know that type, and talking about movies with them isn’t fun.

“Stupid movie! It was just a stupid movie!” If anyone else picks out the movie, that is. Combine a superiority complex and an attempt at intelligible discourse, and it never bodes well for anyone.

But that aside, K gave me flashbacks to the book club I started and abruptly ended a few years prior.

I chose the first book because I was planning to read it anyway and everyone agreed they wanted to read it too. The first meeting was at a low-key restaurant where we chose a table in the corner and began to… discuss (for lack of a better word).

“I hated the characters! They were awful!”

“It was just a stupid book about a bunch of spoiled brats.”

“So superficial.”

“So dumb.”

“So beneath me.”

What a great idea that was. My friend, V, and I looked at each other from across the table and shook our heads.

I stopped reading the second book about 30 pages in because I didn’t like it. It wasn’t my type of book, which was okay. I didn’t ruin the meeting by telling everybody how not-for-me the book was over and over and over… and over. I simply told them why it wasn’t my kinda book, adding enough humor to let the girl who chose the book know that it wasn’t a big deal, and then I let them talk it out without interjecting with explosions of negativity.

For the third book, V offered up a suggestion, and everyone pulled out their phones to find a synopsis.

Snicker. “Sounds like a soap opera.”

Another snicker. “If that’s the next book, I’m going to skip it.”

Okay then. Onto the next suggestion, which was a book no less soap-opera-esque than the one V had suggested, but no one complained.

Note: I’m not going to say that nobody complained because it was someone other than the two blonde girls who shaved their legs (me and V) that suggested it, but I’m not going to say it wasn’t why, either.

V and I both liked the book, but we bailed on the book club. Whether or not the others continued to meet, didn’t ask, didn’t care. But that’s what happens when you start a book club with a bunch of vegans in Austin.

I decided I’ll rant my thoughts about movies, books, television, music, celebs, and whatever else on a blog instead. No interruptions and unnecessary skepticism from the holier-than-thous that I’m emulating here now.

(Emulation, over and out.)

I’m such a drama queen; I know. Cheers!

ME!

I love stories.

Whether in the form of a movie, book, TV show, mini-series, or exaggerated tale from a coworker’s morning-after procrastination disguised as brewing more coffee, I soak it all up, let it sink it, and then analyze it to death. (Okay, I don’t always wait for it to sink in.)

Still. Why? How? Who? Where? When? What? WHY?!

I’m more apt to write about what I do like than what I don’t like, so expect more recommendations than cautionary cues. There are a lot of ridiculous excuses for entertainment out there, but I don’t want to be the reason someone doesn’t watch the movie that might become their favorite or read the book they can’t put down. And knowing the emotional exhaustion it takes to breathe life into a creative project, I don’t like to smash the efforts of other creative thinkers to bits.

And me? What do I love besides stories in all of their glorious forms?

Sitting by the pool.
Eating linguini.
Twirling my hair.
David Foster Wallace
Baseball.
Pajamas.
Too much coffee.
Board games.
French fries.
Dennis Lehane.
Crossword puzzles.
Sunglasses.
Mornings.
Gigantic bathtubs.
Dresses.
Rupert Friend.
More Coffee.
Exercising tomorrow.
Not camping.
Wondering if I’m being people-watched.
Trivia.
The ’90s.
Documentaries.
Chantecaille lip gloss.
Everything pink.
Cats.
Roller coasters.
Alphabetizing.
Fountain soda with lots of ice.
Fluffy towels.

That’s all. I’m pretty simple. I hope you enjoy my blog. ☺